worse

Hanya karena lu tau dia baik, dan dia tetap di tempat yang sama, bukan berarti dia sonde berubah dan perasaannya tetap sama.

B kira dia bakal tetap disana dengan perasaan dan pemikiran yang baik tentang b. Tapi mungkin karena waktu dan jarak, ktng jadi asing.

B benci perasaan ini. Orang yang sama, perasaan yang su berubah. B sonde bisa menemukan orang yang sama dalam diri dia.

We are growing, evolving, become different side we want.

Dan dia su berubah, begitu juga b.

Life happens.

People change.

B benci orang yang harusnya liat b tapi su liat orang lain, dan sonde memandang b dengan cara yang sama lagi.

This is the worst feeling ever.

What were you in 2016?

Today is 2026.

2016 was 10 years ago from today.

What am I in 2016?

What are we in 2016?

I was still in college when I was in 2016.

We were so pure.

We were so naive.

We were so beautiful.

And it hurts so much to remember that year.

I remember I live life to the fullest that year.

Because I remember someone older than me told me that my college year will never be back again. And will never be the same again.

That age will never come back again, so make it to the fullest. Love all your friends and never regrets it.

Or at least you'll regret what you did than regret you'll never did it.

I remember I'm afraid I'll regret I'll never make it, so I live like I'll die tomorrow.

But in that year I was hurt, and I hurt some friends too.

I didn't know what is financial stability or financial responsibility back then. All I did was studied, play and love hard.

I should learn to take care of my heart and it's okay not to have more than 1 relationships in college just because I thought it define myself's worth. It's not. I just hurt more people.

That's fine to learn a little, that it's okay to not be okay.

You're afraid you'll become like that monster like your dad, and it end up eat yourself up.

Years later you'll find peace and live alone with two cats are much more better than live with your parents.

And you'll figure out about your financial stability. You learned it in the hard way. But you didn't give up on yourself.

You realize in 2026... That person in 2016... Actually... You can be with him... But at that time you deny it.

You thought you can get more of good looking guy than him...

But guess what? No one was good enough than him.

And your friends were right. You should be with him. But your thoughts only focus about appearance and physical.

And you still think that way until years later.

Then in 2026 you end up alone, crying in your small rent room and thinking you can be with him actually.

But it's late because he already get beautiful women beside him, and love him much more than what you did. You did dirty to him.

And you were a mess back then. And you thought you actually afraid someone close to you, care about you, like yourself, and you're afraid you'll mess it up, and you don't want to be the problem or make people to believe you're the problem in your relationship, that you end up deny his flirt.

He never confess. But somehow your friends told you he did like you.

Then you thought it's just a joke. Because he flirt at you like other guys always flirt at you.

And you thought all the boys are the same and you can't identified whose the right man between them.

Because there is no right man.

Only the man whose willing to love you like you do. Whose willing to spent the rest of his life with you, because you are you. Like you want to spent the rest of your life with him, because he is himself.

No other reason. No other option.

You don't like being an option, so you never make a man as an option.

I think I just lose that man...