When you're 23

When you're 23, there would be so much going on.
There wouldn't be task and homework like in a high school.
Life would be much harder when you're jobless, life would be much hell when you got a job with minimum paid, and life would be a nuisance when you get paid higher and not much fun for yourself.

When you're 23, life is no joke.
Many of your friends get married, and some of them get divorced at this age.
His parents get divorced, her little brother is drug addicts.
She get married because her dad is cheating from her mom and now he's laying in bed, get stroke.
You find your girl friends become a single mom, when you still a single human being.

When you're 23, you know you're not okay at all.
You got problems which makes you crazy.
Life would be seen as grey to you.
Fuckin' people always exist and they could be your dear ones.
Your heart would be torn multiple times.
Nights would be cold and you find yourself cry all night.
That's why you go out at night, with some friends and some vodka, so you won't be sad anymore, so you could go to bed while drunk and didn't remember anything that night.

When you're 23, life won't be easy as you want.
You can't become that person, even if you want to.
Some of your friends become a millionaire, some of them always go to vacation as much as they want, while you were stuck with your dream in your small room.
You would falling multiple times, crying more than you thought, and bleeding as you've been dead.
But your dream still a dream, no matter how much you tried.

When you're 23, you started to ask yourself where did you go wrong.
Are you not good enough? or did you make a mistake in the past that makes you always fail?
As I find myself I can't easily forgive those who hurt me in the past,
I asked myself, is it my true self or did I already lost myself?
I started ask myself, which one is my priority, myself or the person who hurt me?
If I focused too much on getting revenge to those people, I won't be happy.
Then it would only hurt me.
I wouldn't get my priority on myself for being happy.
Why don't I just keep going and bring my dead soul to the beautiful future?
Maybe one day, these soul would be heal... the time would fix everything...
I just have to focused on myself.
I just have to take care of myself.
Then one day...
Maybe, one day...